Okay. That title is totally misleading. My angst isn’t writing related, it’s about feedback. I take these pages I enjoy so much (am I delusional?). I’ve spent hours pouring over, editing, rewriting. I hand them (or in most cases, mail them) to first family members and then friends.
It’s like I’ve handed over a piece of my heart, my hope. These characters are so much a part of my life. I’m introducing them to you. Fear of rejection sets in.
Then I get those first few comments from my reviewers and breathe a sigh of relief. Ah, they liked it. “A page turner.” “Unique.” “Great.” And honestly, what did I expect my mom, sister-in-law and niece to say?
Verbal responses. I am pleased, encouraged, smiling.
Anxious to work out the kinks and add polish to my work (improve my craft, I would say in critique group), I flip through the hard-copy. Typo marked here, “Don’t understand” note there, a grammar construct I knew she didn’t like is marked each time it occurred.
I am…deflated. There’s almost no constructive feedback. Standard response, “ I got into the story too much to write.” Is this a line? Did they really like it that much?
I know my writing needs work. I want to rewrite, to improve, to make the writing something I am proud of.
That’s not true at all.
I want to make it something you will like.
Something that will give every person who might like it a chance to discover these characters. To live with them each day as I do. A chance to see where their story will take us.
I wait for pages from my next friendly reviewer.